At the core of all human behavior, our needs are more or less similar. Positive experience is easy to handle. Itâ€™s negative experience that we all, by definition, struggle with. Therefore, what we get out of life is not determined by the good feelings we desire but by what bad feelings weâ€™re willing and able to sustain to get us to those good feelings.
How bad would things have to get, for you to spend all of your money so your family could cram into a small, flimsy, rubber boat with 40 other people? Imagine you canâ€™t swim, and nor can anyone else in your family. Itâ€™s night, you have no lights, and you must travel six miles across choppy seas. There is no captain. A man who has never even been on a boat will navigate. They tell you to sit on the dinghyâ€™s inflated edge with your son on your lap. Your husband must stand, and you cannot see your brother near the back, because itâ€™s so dark. How bad would things have to be, before you put your family in that boat? How bad would things have to get, before you actually felt lucky to get a spot on that boat?
An excellent list from Sara Goldstein on questions to ask your kid instead of the routine “How was your day?”. My favorites in the list are
What was the nicest thing you did for someone else?
Who made you smile today?
From a colleague, a great post on handling situations or projects where you are set up to fail.
Experience also brings knowledge of what it takes to prepare to avoid this kind of set up in the future.
Michael Hyatt’s post on 12 ways to know if you are a leader should really be named the leadership checklist.